Do Not Be Afraid! (12th Sunday, Year A)

To listen to this homily, click here.

  Our readings this morning center around the tension that exists between fear and faith, insecurity and trust, persecution and vindication. From an early age, most of us have been taught that God always wins, he never gives us more than we can handle and yet, don’t we sometimes find ourselves in situations that seem terrifying, overwhelming, and just too much. In my own limited experience, it is difficult to hold onto both realities at the same time; very often in times of fear and suffering, there is that nagging doubt: “where is God?” “Maybe I was wrong to trust in Him.” It is only later, when we make it through the crucible that we see God’s triumph and protection. As Christians, one of the great gifts we have to offer is what we hear Jesus say several times to his apostles in the gospel, “Do not be afraid!” That message can be transformative and healing but it is not so simple as just telling someone, “Don’t worry, be happy!”

As I was praying with these readings, a memory came to me about the first time I remember being overwhelmed with fear, absolutely certain that my life was over. I suppose I was 5 or 6 and I was riding my bike on the side of our house in Hazelwood. One of my delinquent siblings had left a broom laying across the path and it was really causing trouble as I went back and forth. In frustration, I hopped off my bike and gave the broom a rage-inspired heave-ho…right through our neighbor’s basement window. I was horrified because these were the scary neighbors and as luck would have it, I soon heard sirens in the distance. In my mind, I was going to jail, my freedom was gone, and I was going to be another statistic of a young life squandered by crime. I ran inside and hid behind the couch, holding our pet rabbit for what I was sure was the last time. I waited for the cops to arrive, and waited, and waited. After what seemed forever, I worked up the courage to tell mom what I had done and was shocked by how amused and unconcerned she seemed to be. Was I being raised by a criminal who delighted in the destruction of property?! After my frantic recounting of the events and a lengthy pouring out of my fears, mom simply said, “it will be fine; let’s go talk to them.” When the neighbors opened the door and heard the story, they just sort of laughed and said it was no big deal. My mom assured them that we would pay for the piece of glass and that was it! I remember feeling so relieved and joyful after it was done and truly marveling that I had been delivered from the fate my imagination had pronounced!

So many times in our lives, we go through this process of fear and doom. We mess up, we miss out, or someone hurts us and some part of us thinks our situation is hopeless and cannot be fixed. It seems funny when it’s kid-stuff but it isn’t funny for the person going through it. As we move through life, we long for the simple times when the biggest mistake or worry was a bad grade or a broken piece of glass. For those who have been through the trials and tribulations of life, a perspective is gained that realizes our fears are usually much worse than reality, nothing is hopeless; God prevails. We emerge from these valleys wiser, stronger, more courageous and resilient than ever. We also learn what is actually important and what doesn’t really matter. Every parent has consoled a child who did poorly on a test or homework assignment and thinks their life is ruined. Every parent has comforted their teen lamenting their first breakup, wondering if they will ever love again. Each one of us looks back on moments of our lives where we were afraid, desperate, or down, knowing now that it wasn’t the end of the world. Do we take time to draw these same lessons about our spiritual lives and the the fears that face our soul?

Jesus has just given the apostles the authority to heal, preach, and cast out demons. He tells them to make haste and go to the Chosen people with his Good News. They are pumped. Then he warns them, you will be rejected, persecuted, and run out. But do not be afraid; they cannot hurt your spirit if you stay true to me. In other words, ‘I care for you; God cares for you. No matter what, don’t worry about what they say or think about you. Don’t worry about what they threaten or do. But make sure and acknowledge me before them and I will acknowledge you before the Father. If you deny me before them, I will deny you before the Father.’

Think about this line, especially in light of the many fears you and I often act out of. Notice how Jesus doesn’t say we have to win every argument or look like the smartest person in the room; he just asks us to acknowledge him before others. Are there times when we fear rejection from society, from co-workers, friends, or even our family…and so we deny Jesus and the truths of his gospel? Are there times we want people to like us so we keep our mouths shut about Gospel teaching, especially as it relates to marriage, human dignity, and sexuality? Does our fear of being cancelled, labelled, or cast out from the in-crowd drive us to deny Jesus with our silence when we hear Catholic values and beliefs being mocked or misrepresented? Do we sometimes value the idea that we don’t want to rock the boat, that we just want to be normal and blend in, and so we choose not to share how faith guides our choices and beliefs? I often hear that there is a silent majority when it comes to Christian values in our society. But Jesus places no value on a silent majority nor on followers who remain quiet in the face of fear or hardship. To him, silence is not golden, silence is denial and a lack of trust that he will be with us through it all.

To wrap up, I look back at so many things that I thought were absolutely most important and at mistakes I thought were insurmountable. None of them matter anymore and most have been completely forgotten. I believe at the end of our lives, we will look back at most of the fears, insecurities, and spiritual hesitations that seem so important now and we will realize, next to God’s love and power, they mean nothing, they have no power. Let’s make sure we don’t have this “Eureka moment” too late! Let’s resolve to acknowledge Jesus and his teaching on the tough issues of our times so that he will acknowledge us before his heavenly Father. We see the ways he kept his promise to the apostles and he will keep his promise to us too!

 

Divine Donor (Corpus Christi, 2023)

 To listen to this homily, click here.

About 7 years ago, a 21 y/o man named Donovan died in an accident. 

He was an organ donor and several people were given a new lease on life when they received his organs.

One recipient was a man in his early 60’s named John who had been dealing with heart failure until he received Donovan’s strong and healthy heart after the tragic accident. 

Apparently there are protocols that allow you to thank the donor’s family in writing but you cannot identify yourself. So John thanked Donovan’s family after he had recovered from the transplant. The family responded with a letter of their own along with two pictures  of their son and brother so John would put a face with a name.

Move forward about 4 years; Each season, the cardinals hold a Transplant awareness day at the ballpark, hosted by the major research hospitals we are blessed to have in our city. During the registration before the game, wouldn’t you know it?! John and his family saw a group of people wearing bright green shirts and on the front was the same picture of the young man he had received in the mail a few years ago.

 A joyful and tearful introduction was made, you might say it was a sort of reunion as well as John thanked Donovan’s family for the gift of life he enjoyed from their beloved’s heart. Perhaps most powerfully, Donovan’s family, one by one, put their head on John’s chest to listen to his heart, which had once beat in the chest of their son and brother.

From this happy meeting strangers became family and joy sprung out of tragedy!

It’s hard for me to think of a better natural example of the Eucharist on this feast of Corpus Christi, where we remember how blessed we are to receive the Body and Blood of Jesus.

Because of sin, the human race was enduring a complete failure  within our bodies and souls. Without a new heart, we were destined to life of pain, misery, and condemnation. 

But God who is so good never gave up on us. Time and time again he sent heavenly healers in the law and the prophets to address our spiritual condition. 

Finally, in the fulness of time, he sent his Son to set us free from the heart condition of sin and death that threatened to destroy us. Jesus not only gave us his heart, he gives us his entire self whenever we receive the Body and Blood in the Eucharist. Because he is God, this gift doesn’t change Him into us, it changes us into him if we surrender our own will and give into his.

How grateful we should be to God for this amazing and undeserved Gift! How incredible that God cared enough about you and me to allow his Son to suffer in such ways to bring us back to life! No wonder the Father loves us so as he hears the heart of his Son beating within us!

But that gift comes with a responsibility on our part. Because it cost Jesus so dearly, we must never take the Eucharist for granted or forget the sacrifice it involved. To do so would be to dishonor the donor.

Imagine how hurtful it would be to Donovan’s family if, after his transplant, John lived an unhealthy lifestyle, ate horrible food, and never made an effort to think of or thank the one who gave him so much. Technically, it would be his right to make these sort of choices but it would NOT be the right thing to do.

The same is true with you and me and the Eucharist. We have been given an incredible gift. Let’s not forget it. At this point in time, around 70% of Catholics do not believe that the Eucharist is actually Jesus. Perhaps even more just don’t really think about it or find other things to do week in and week out rather than letting God love them as he gives us his entire self. Let’s not take Jesus for granted! Let’s make sure and show him the honor and gratitude he deserves every time we receive holy communion by being fully present and prepared. Let’s live a spiritually healthy life and honor the new heart we have received in Christ by avoiding sin, worshipping God and serving our neighbor. May God hear his Son’s heart beating strongly within us by the holy and healthy way we live. O sacrament most holy, O sacrament divine, all praise and all thanksgiving be every moment thine! 

Choose Community Over Confinement (Trinity Sunday 2023)

 To listen to this homily, click here.

One of my go-to breakfast foods is a bowl of oatmeal. Like many people, when I’m eating, I like to read something during my meal. If the paper is not available, then the cereal box or the oatmeal carton will suffice. Staring at the Quaker Oats guy staring at me as I eat, I start to wonder, is he smiling or frowning? What did he do for fun? Why did he get into the oatmeal business and other important considerations. I did hear an interesting Quaker story recently; as you may know, they were pacifists. In other words, they did everything they could to avoid violence and war. As they settled here in America, it bothered them that most serious crimes were punished either by severe lashing which disfigured the criminal or by hanging which gave offenders a permanent pain in the neck. The Quakers wanted to find a better way so they came up with the idea of solitary confinement in the hopes of offering the criminal a more humane method to pay his debt to society and be reformed. The logic was that solitary confinement would remove the person from bad influences, give them a contemplative environment to repair their relationship with God, and provide a sort of monastic moment to think about what they had done. On paper, it seemed like a great plan; in practice it was a disaster. Criminals who were subjected to this new form of justice often went insane and were profoundly broken, spiritually, mentally, and emotionally. Even the well-intentioned Quakers, who hoped this could be a non-violent alternative, abandoned the practice after just a couple years. What they forgot, in their effort to propose something new, was a fundamental truth about human beings, something scripture teaches from the very beginning: Man was made in God’s image, and it is not good for the man to be alone. We need each other and are meant to be in community. Once we are isolated and cut off, it doesn’t take long for a person to deteriorate in every way. One of the most damaging parts of the Covid-19 pandemic was the separation of lockdowns and quarantines. Regardless of how you feel about how things were handled, we don’t want to forget how profoundly the isolation affected people of every age group. Even now, years later, the effects are still manifesting themselves. You and I were made for communion; it is not healthy or good for us to be in solitary confinement!

This first Sunday after the Easter season is called Trinity Sunday and we are invited to reflect on the central mystery of our faith, the mystery of Who God is. So often, we talk about what God does, which is fine, but since we are made in the image of God, knowing who he is teaches us important truths about ourselves.

The mystery of the Trinity teaches that within God, there is a perfect, loving community of Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. This divine love doesn’t just stay within the Trinity. The love of the Trinity is what brings about the creation of the world. And in the fullness of time, this same love moved God to send his only begotten Son into the world, to save it from sin and death. Once again, love compels Jesus to send the Holy Spirit to protect and guide the Church until he returns at the end of time. We are never left alone at any point in human history; God is always nearby to heal, help, and save. These examples are just a sampling of the great mystery of the Trinity which teaches us about God who is all-loving and lives in perfect relationship as Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. 

This mystery is not meant to be something that remains in our head. The Trinity is meant to transform our lives, our families, and our world. As baptized Catholics, the life of the Trinity actually dwells in our souls through grace. 

We might ask ourselves the following questions: does my life reflect the life of the Trinity? Is the perfect relationship of love that exists between the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit reflected in the way we live our lives? Within our own hearts, do we acknowledge and truly believe that we are made in God’s image and likeness? Do we embody this truth in the way we act, in the words we speak, in the entertainment we enjoy, in the clothes we wear, and the company we keep? Do people look at us and see an image of God’s love and joy? Or do they see things like self-hate, anger, revenge, lust, greed, or jealousy?

How about our families? It is in the home that the mystery of the Trinity is most powerfully reflected. Do our families imitate the loving relationship seen in our God? Are we able to make sacrifices for our family in all things? Are we making sure we love the people entrusted to our care? The love of God holds nothing back; he sacrifices everything for those he loves. We are called to love others in the very same way. So what does this mean in our everyday lives?

Children: love your parents and your brothers and sisters. Be kind and respectful to everyone around you. Make it a habit to take care of others and think of them first. You can do this in simple little ways like cleaning off the table after dinner, unloading the dishwasher, sharing your time and toys, cleaning your room, and so on. Even these little acts of kindness are an opportunity to spread the love of God and help others so they don’t feel alone. 

Husbands and wives: love one another with a love that knows no limits. Remind yourselves of the commitment you made to each other on your wedding day. Be patient with each other’s faults and failings. Be willing to listen when your spouse wants to talk about a bad day. Make it a habit to think of the other person first; by doing little acts of kindness every day, you will reflect the love of our triune God and ensure that your spouse isn’t imprisoned by the loneliness of being ignored or unappreciated.

The greatest threat to meaningful community, the thing that attacks our communion with God, ourselves, and others is sin. Every time we choose evil and selfishness rather than goodness and virtue, we slowly cut ourselves off from the things and people that keep us healthy and flourishing. Despite what the world and the devil tell us, we cannot find purpose and fulfillment by indulging the things that lead us away from God. In the end, we will place ourselves in a sort of spiritual solitary confinement that hurts our souls, minds, hearts, and bodies.

 How blessed we are to be cared for by a God who is love! A God who never stops looking for us and inviting into communion with Him and with others! A God who heals, helps, and breaks us out of the prisons we build for ourselves! Let us be reminded now and every time we make the sign of the cross that we are called to be a people of the trinity, a people who live love and right relationship with ourselves, with our families, and with those we encounter each and every day. In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit. Amen.

Variety is the Spice of Life and a Sign of the Spirit (Pentecost 2023)

 To listen to this homily, click here.

One of my favorite parts of having lots of siblings is seeing how each of them has their own unique personality and talents. Even though we might be part of the same family, with the same parents and upbringing, all of us are very different. From an early age, you could see hints as to the type of person my siblings would grow up to be. Some are caregivers and peacemakers, others are gregarious and outgoing, a few are reflective and quiet, and several are fighters, ready to stick up for anyone they feel has been wronged. I see the same diverse patterns as an uncle and I love it! Some of my nieces and nephews are orderly and disciplined. Others are the life of the party and have to be kept in line. Some are open hearts, where tears and laughs come easily while others are stoic and leave you guessing at what they might be thinking. Many of them are laid back and happy to go with the flow while a few are the leaders of the pack, deciding which game will be played and who-sits-where at the kids’ table.  

This is not a unique human experience. Certainly all of you know what I am talking about as you think of similar instances with your friends and family. Even though different personalities might sometimes drive us crazy at home, in social circles or at work, it is that very diversity that makes life exciting, enriching, and enjoyable. It is one of the things I love most about my family. Imagine a home, a world, a church where everyone was exactly the same?! It would be terrible on so many levels! The most dynamic marriages, friendships, families, and parishes tend to be composed of very different personalities united by a shared goal or mission. That is the bond which unifies two or more people who might seem to be at opposite ends of the spectrum.

As a spiritual family here at Incarnate Word, we have that same wonderful mix of personalities, gifts, and talents. Some of you are naturally more outgoing, funny, emotive, or leadership-minded. Others tend to be serious, rational, level-headed, or easy going. Some of you are great planners, have the gift of hospitality, or can see the big picture. Others are detail-oriented, prefer to do things behind the scenes, or are not afraid to speak your mind. However, without something incredible in common, without something significant to unite us, we would be a disaster. Our different personalities and backgrounds would end up being a source of conflict rather than something we celebrate and enjoy. Of course, what brings and keeps us together is not just the fact that we live in St. Louis or grew up in the area or happen to love our parish. What really unites us and makes this parish dynamic is Jesus Christ and his gift of the Holy Spirit, who blesses our individual gifts and personalities and transforms them into something powerful. 

As we say goodbye to another Easter Season and prepare to enter ordinary time for the next 6 months, it is good for us to reflect on the birthday of the Church, the feast of Pentecost. For more than a billion people around the world, the Catholic Church is the bond that unites people of every race and nation. Today is the day when we celebrate the gift of the Holy Spirit, which was poured out on the Apostles, empowering them to go out and gather people together in Christ. After they received the Holy Spirit, the apostles came to life. They begin to fire on all cylinders, their personalities and gifts were on display for the whole world to see. From this point on, they each go their separate ways with their unique talents but united by that one crucial message: “Jesus is risen; death and sin are defeated. Everyone deserves to hear this Good News so they can be saved.”

Each of the apostles would live out their faith in a slightly different way. Some would teach, others would heal and work miracles, while a few would write letters and gospels that we still reflect on today. All of them proclaimed the Good News in their own style, guided by the Holy Spirit but also true to their own personality and life experience. They didn’t become different people after Pentecost, they became transformed people. Their families and friends would have recognized them but would have noticed something new, deeper, more alive. 

The same is true here at Incarnate Word. God wants to bless the individual characteristics that make you who you are. He wants to transform them into the strengths that will enable you to proclaim the gospel in ways that no one else can or has before! He will do this through the gift of His Holy Spirit, first given in baptism and then more fully when we are confirmed. For our part we have three simple things to do. 

1)The first task is to invite the Holy Spirit to make his home in our heart. Even though he is God, the Holy Spirit is gentle and respectful when when it comes to us. He wants to be our welcomed guest and his gifts only work when they are received into a life that is docile and inviting. He won’t force his way into our hearts. So, please, say that simple, ancient prayer often, “come Holy Spirit.” That is all He needs, nothing fancy, just a heartfelt invitation to make his home in your soul. If you ask, he will answer, guaranteed!

2) The second responsibility we have is to develop the personality and gifts we were born with. Becoming a saint does not mean getting rid of these things; it just means we let God use them. If you have a sense of humor, if you are organized, if you love to lead, or study or take care of people or listen, or whatever your talent and disposition is, use it, refine it, and know that, more than likely it will be the way you live out your faith. There is no one way to be holy or serve God and others. In fact each of us will do it in a slightly different manner. That is why it is so important to discover and develop who we are humanly and spiritually.

3) Don’t seek to be comfortable. One of the defining qualities of the Holy Spirit is that he always leads us to do more and be more than we could ever imagine. The Spirit will comfort us at all times and in all things but he cannot work in a heart that wants to control and avoid challenge. The times in my life where I have seen the most growth and the greatest miracles were always when I gave the Holy Spirit permission to stretch me and be in charge. This process of All Things New is an opportunity for our parish and our archdiocese to do just that and we should not let it pass us by!!

If the twelve apostles were able to go out, with the help of the Holy Spirit, and change the world as we know it, imagine what the community of Incarnate Word could do?! As long as we remain friends of God, homes of the Holy Spirit, there is no limit to how He can use us to renew the face of the earth!

Last Words (Ascension, 2023)

 One of the most privileged parts of the priesthood is giving the last rites and being present as someone takes their final breaths. 

In these sacred moments, all of the unimportant things are set aside. No one reminds their family to cut the grass every week or promise to change the air filters for the furnace once they are gone. Those things might be necessary but they are irrelevant. Most often it is not the person dying saying anything at all but rather the friends and family. And what is spoken is always significant and usually simple. Things like, “I love you”, “thank you”, “you can be at peace”, “go join your beloved”, etc… No matter how many times I witness these sacred moments, it always hits me like a ton of bricks and stays with me for days. It also makes me wonder what my last words to loved ones will be… I just hope they can be repeated at my funeral!

With today’s celebration of the Ascension, we get the last words of Jesus from two different sources, St. Luke and St. Matthew. And they are a different type of “last words”. They are not those of a dying person but more like those of a parent who knows their child is about to experience a new stage of life and independence. These are like the words to a 16 year-old who is about to take the car out by themselves for the first time, or the college freshman who is being dropped off at school, or the young person getting ready to head out on vacation with friends. 

These last words are not “goodbye, forever” but rather “I know we need to be separated in this way for your own good but here are some things to keep you safe and on track.”

What does Jesus tell his followers and us?

That they are never alone, He is with them always until the end of time.

That all power in heaven and earth has been given to Him and they are to participate in that saving power by going out into the whole world and baptizing in his name. Their faith is not a private matter to be kept quiet but something that must be shared.

St. Luke builds on this as we hear in Acts that Jesus pours on the loving advice:

Don’t leave Jerusalem until you receive the gift of the Holy Spirit! It’s only a few days away; you can do this!

And when they ask when Jesus is going to return and set everything right, once and for all, he says, trust me, that’s not your concern, just worry about being my witnesses to the world AFTER the Holy Spirit comes to you!

Lastly, he tells them to be witnesses, not just to their friends and families in Jerusalem, but also their countrymen in Judah and even their ethnic enemies in Samaria. They must be good examples always, everywhere, to everyone. No one is excluded from hearing the gospel and everyone deserves a chance to let it transform their lives.

Now what do kids do when their parents give them advice? Usually roll their eyes, or think yeah, yeah, I know just let me get on with it!

Matthew tells us that the disciples doubted when they saw Jesus. They had a hard time accepting his words, but even in the midst of their doubt, they did the right thing, they worshipped him, they submitted to God and in time, with the grace of the HS at Pentecost, they figured it out and became effective witnesses throughout the world.

But Christ’s command to the apostles didn’t stop with them; his mandate to “Go and make disciples of all nations” extends to you and me too. Even though Christ has ascended into heaven, even though we are waiting for his return at any moment of every day, we are expected to evangelize and give witness to all we have received through the gift of our faith. All of us have received the gift of the Holy Spirit by virtue of our Baptism and those of us who have been confirmed have also received the grace of Pentecost in our souls. 

The Ascension reminds us that it is time to spread the gospel by sharing how our faith has made a difference in our lives, whether we are a priest, parent, teacher, professional, full-time student, teen, or child. This is our job as we anticipate Christ’s second coming; we are not just supposed to sit around, hoping we are ready when Jesus returns. 

I point out this command to spread the Good News because far too often people think it is something reserved for deacons, priests, bishops, and these who have consecrated their lives to Christ. And while it is my full-time job to spread the gospel, it is yours as well. One of the reasons many people do not know Christ or live the gospel is because ordinary Christians do not realize the power of their witness and their ability to spread the saving message of Our Lord through daily conversations. One of the reasons our Church is shrinking and why we are going through this painful process of All Things New, is not just a lack of priests, it is also a lack of witness on the part of all Catholics. We have grown comfortable and indistinguishable from those who do not believe. Each of us, by nature of our baptism, is called to be share the Good News and bring Jesus to the people around us. This is the beauty of the Christian vocation; all of us, through our everyday work and relationships, have the opportunity to be made holy and to bring others to Christ. The Ascension compels and commands us to use this time before he returns as an opportunity to bring others to the Lord. It is not enough simply to take care of ourselves.

As we celebrate the Ascension , let us pay close attention to these last words of Christ. First, let us thank God for the gift of our faith, which was given to us by those following the Lord’s command to share the Good News. Second, let us resolve to share our own faith with those we encounter in our lives by the joyful and peaceful ways we carry ourselves and by meaningful and sincere friendship. Finally, let us recommit ourselves to the practice of personal prayer, so our witness to the gospel will not be empty words but a genuine and passionate display of the life of the Holy Spirit. In this way, we will honor Christ by making disciples of all nations.

A Mother's Love (May 2023)

 To listen to this homily, click here.

This past week, our school hosted a morning of celebration with students and their mothers, called “muffins with moms.” It was a fun few hours that started with Mass and continued with a reception in the gym that resulted in nearly 700 blueberry muffins being consumed! I was the celebrant of the Mass and it was sweet to look out at various points during the liturgy and see the students nestled in the pews next to mom, content and happy. What stood out to me was how so many mothers were subtly but constantly drawing their children close, putting their arms around them, connecting and reassuring with affectionate touch. Of course there were a few much-needed mom-glares directed at students goofing around, thinking the time away from teacher was a chance to get away with something. We all know that mom sees everything!

That morning and, of course Mother’s Day which we celebrate today, made me think of the various ways my life and my soul has been nurtured and guided by my mom. There are countless things mom has done for me and I imagine most of them will never be known until I meet God and He shows me the whole picture. However, three main qualities jump out at me regarding a mother’s love as I have experienced it personally but also as I see it present in our families and in our spiritual mother, the Church.

Dependable/consistent: Story of ripping open knee, freaked mom out but she stayed on point. Seemed like mom was never sick or unavailable; in the back of your mind we knew that if all else failed, we could always count on her. I think of all the busy days and long nights taking care of us, putting up with our antics and still making sure a meal was ready, clean clothes were available, and we had everything we needed and more. It seemed like magic at the time, like some special creature got things done and ready for us but of course, it was mom. 

Teacher: Mom was literally our teacher because we were homeschooled. And most of us were not dream students, resembling mules more than humans seeking knowledge! But she hung in there and did what she could to make us as educated as possible, one day after another. 

But this teaching is not the one I am most grateful for, as great as it was. Most importantly, as a priest and as a human, my mom taught me the lessons of the heart. How to care for others, how to sympathize and have empathy, how to show compassion, mercy, and patience. I continue to marvel at my mom’s intuition and instincts and I am grateful that some of those qualities have been infused in me as her son. These lessons of the heart benefit not only me but all those I am called to serve and love in my life. It is wisdom I use every day!

Sacrificial love: There is no way to become a mom without sacrifice. The process of carrying a child in pregnancy and the way a woman’s body gives of itself to foster the gift of life is a living parable of sacrificial love. The birth of a child is just the beginning of how deeply a mother’s heart can love. 

I remember the shock I experienced when I finally started to realize that mom didn’t do the countless things she did because they were her greatest dream and desire; she did them because she loved us! As a youngster, I just assumed she loved making dozens of sandwiches everyday for lunch, changing diapers, cleaning up after us, shopping for groceries, serving as referee for our never-ending arguments, and getting interrupted and heckled from dawn to dusk, about anything and everything. A mother’s love is constantly giving to others without counting the cost, without asking, “what will you do for me?” Certainly this is the most beautiful gift a mother gives to her children because it is the gift of herself; a gift which cannot be bought or sold, lost or earned.  There is nothing quite like a mother’s love, which is simultaneously fierce and tender and it is no wonder the Scriptures use it as an image of how God loves us. And the only way we can repay such love, is by loving in return. 

Knowing what a blessing our moms have been to us, it is alarming to see the social trends that attack and cheapen the essential identity and holy beauty of motherhood and womanhood. Women, with their God-given gifts, play an irreplaceable role in the family, in the Church, and in the world. It is sometimes said that in a family, the father is the head and the mother is the heart. Others describe it with the husband being the head and the wife is the neck which determines where and what the head faces. In any case, both are distinct yet complimentary. When we read the story of creation in Genesis, we are reminded that God made man and woman in his own image, each reflecting different aspects of God’s life-giving love. God also desired man and woman to be partners, not competitors.  It was only after sin entered the world that men and women begin to see each other as a threat and adversary. And notice how satan always starts trouble; by attacking the woman! If he can turn her, he can influence the hearts of men! He tries the same approach today which is why it is so important for all of us to pray for and support the many moms and women who who seek to live the gifts God has given them. 

Mothers, I hope you know the great treasure you are and forever will be. You are irreplaceable. If you were missing, not even the best dad couldn't fill your shoes. A man, no matter what the culture may say, can never replace you. You possess in your very being, soul, and body, talents given by the Lord which St. John Paul II rightly called “the feminine genius”. It was to uphold this treasure, this unique image of God which each of you reveal, that men were given their masculinity and strength. 

Every mother, then, whether married or single, whether in the Church or out, will always be able to find a home in our Church -- for home is where the heart is -- and I pray our parish will always love and defend and celebrate you. We thank God for you. And we're sorry when we haven't loved you nearly as well as you deserve. 

May God bless our moms, living and deceased, on this day and every day. May they always know how thankful we are for the countless sacrifices, teachings, and acts of love they did on our behalf. Let us never grow complacent in repaying their dedication and love by praying for them, giving them our respect, and helping them in whatever way they need. For each of them have reflected the image of God to us and we are forever grateful!

Everyone Has a Plan Until They Get Punched in the Mouth (5th Sunday of Easter, Year A)

To listen to this homily, click here.

This season of spring and the month of May makes it easier for me to smile and be in a better mood! I suppose this is less true for those who suffer from allergies or must cut a lot of grass. But for most, the growing daylight, the warmer temperatures, and the approach of summer with its promise of leisure and relaxation lift the minds and hearts of all. Not to be outdone, the Church chooses this time to celebrate the Lord’s Resurrection and partnered with that comes confirmations, first communions, baptisms, and weddings. Last but not least, this is the season for graduations from grade school, high school, and college. 

Speaking of that, here is a crazy stat you may not know. Only about 46% of college graduates, less than half, work in a field closely related to their major. Think of all the work, all the studying, all the tuition, time, and sacrifice which is then seemingly put aside!  What is the reason for so many students who focus on one thing intensely, then end up going another direction, sometimes drastically so? There has been lots of ink spilled on the topic, about the possibility of refining the way students choose their major and giving them more support in making their decision. Others argue that too many people go to college when they should be entering the trades, and still more maintain that employers must stop demanding degrees for jobs that don’t really require them. 

    There is some truth in all these explanations but I think the main cause is even more simple but perhaps less satisfying: this is life! Life happens and so often, along with the changes it brings, our best plans and ideas go out the window. Don’t get me wrong, it is good to have a plan but we need to know that sooner or later, something is going to happen which will require our plan and us, to change, to adapt, to grow, so we can meet the challenge and work through it. Mike Tyson famously said that everyone has a plan until they get punched in the mouth. Great leaders aren’t the ones who come up with a plan or strategy that never changes, they are the ones who can decisively adapt once the original plan starts to fall apart and fail.

    As I celebrate 15 years of being a priest, very little of what I have actually done and experienced is what I had planned. Of course, saying Mass, hearing confessions, celebrating the other sacraments and ministering to people, that has all played out as I hoped it would. But the places I have been assigned, the people I have served, and at times the ways I have been asked to minister, wow, I never would have drawn it up this way! And I thank God for the many twists and turns, the ups and the downs, the surprises and disappointments. Because in all of them, He has taught me more than any plan or life I could create for myself. Being a friend of God requires me and all of us to be flexible and ok with change. Growing in faith is not accounting for every possible outcome or controlling every part of our lives. Instead, living faith is often nothing more than doing our best to be prepared and ready in a prayerful way for whatever God calls us to do on any and every given day!

We see this in our Scriptures today. In the Acts of the Apostles, the young church is growing by leaps and bounds and has increasing needs that must be met. Some of the widows are not receiving their portion of bread and are going hungry. People raise this concern to the apostles and they take it to prayer to find a solution. The answer they are given is to select seven holy men who will be in charge of the distribution of bread and other works of mercy so that no one is neglected. These seven men are the first deacons of our Church and they become the hands and hearts of the twelve apostles, enabling them to help more people while still allowing the twelve to remain in their ministry of prayer and teaching. Growth and change go hand in hand! The Apostles wisely discern that the way they were doing things was no longer sufficient, a change of plans is needed to stay on mission and faithful to what God wanted. To simply say, “this is how we’ve always done things!” or “I’ve made a decision and that’s the end of the discussion!” was not the right way to proceed.

Even after this creation of the diaconate, things would change further for some of the deacons involved. Stephen was essentially put in charge of the first food pantry but he would end up dying as a martyr. Many of them were trained for the work they were asked to do. But their docility and holy flexibility allowed God to use them where they were needed most and the Church grew even more!

That’s the key to the incredible growth of the young Church; they don’t try to control God or make his plans, they defer to God and let him lead even when it seems crazy. God knows better than us but he still wants us to be part of his process. So often we hijack God’s plans and end up making things messy. Like St. Peter says in the 2nd reading, “The stone that the builders rejected has become the cornerstone”. How often has God used the people, the stones, that we and world have cast aside as the building blocks of his Church, his salvation, and his blessings to the world.

In the gospel, Jesus has just washed the feet of the Apostles and he has turned their world upside down by telling them that in order to reign, they must serve. He has made it clear that he must save the world by dying for it and that where he is going, they know the way. This is all a bit too much for poor Phillip and he asks how they will know the way since they don’t know where Jesus is going. Jesus responds with that beautiful line, meant not only for Phillip but also for us, “I am the way, the truth and the life.” In other words, I am the plan, I am the way out, the path forward, the light in the darkness, the calm in the midst of your storm. 

For you and me, who have many great plans which so often fall apart when life punches us in the mouth, Jesus simply says, look at me. I will get you through, I will show you the next step, I have the answers. 

    

    With this in mind, let’s try to turn our eyes to Jesus more often. Especially before a big decision, in moments of confusion, and when we don’t know what comes next. Let’s make our prayer like that of the early church and let God lead rather than trying to bend God to what we want, which never turns out well. Let’s make sure that we are involving God in all our plans and always giving him the final say. Finally, let’s never forget that God always knows best and he will always choose the greatest good for us because he is the way, the truth, and the life!