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This past week, our school hosted a morning of celebration with students and their mothers, called “muffins with moms.” It was a fun few hours that started with Mass and continued with a reception in the gym that resulted in nearly 700 blueberry muffins being consumed! I was the celebrant of the Mass and it was sweet to look out at various points during the liturgy and see the students nestled in the pews next to mom, content and happy. What stood out to me was how so many mothers were subtly but constantly drawing their children close, putting their arms around them, connecting and reassuring with affectionate touch. Of course there were a few much-needed mom-glares directed at students goofing around, thinking the time away from teacher was a chance to get away with something. We all know that mom sees everything!
That morning and, of course Mother’s Day which we celebrate today, made me think of the various ways my life and my soul has been nurtured and guided by my mom. There are countless things mom has done for me and I imagine most of them will never be known until I meet God and He shows me the whole picture. However, three main qualities jump out at me regarding a mother’s love as I have experienced it personally but also as I see it present in our families and in our spiritual mother, the Church.
Dependable/consistent: Story of ripping open knee, freaked mom out but she stayed on point. Seemed like mom was never sick or unavailable; in the back of your mind we knew that if all else failed, we could always count on her. I think of all the busy days and long nights taking care of us, putting up with our antics and still making sure a meal was ready, clean clothes were available, and we had everything we needed and more. It seemed like magic at the time, like some special creature got things done and ready for us but of course, it was mom.
Teacher: Mom was literally our teacher because we were homeschooled. And most of us were not dream students, resembling mules more than humans seeking knowledge! But she hung in there and did what she could to make us as educated as possible, one day after another.
But this teaching is not the one I am most grateful for, as great as it was. Most importantly, as a priest and as a human, my mom taught me the lessons of the heart. How to care for others, how to sympathize and have empathy, how to show compassion, mercy, and patience. I continue to marvel at my mom’s intuition and instincts and I am grateful that some of those qualities have been infused in me as her son. These lessons of the heart benefit not only me but all those I am called to serve and love in my life. It is wisdom I use every day!
Sacrificial love: There is no way to become a mom without sacrifice. The process of carrying a child in pregnancy and the way a woman’s body gives of itself to foster the gift of life is a living parable of sacrificial love. The birth of a child is just the beginning of how deeply a mother’s heart can love.
I remember the shock I experienced when I finally started to realize that mom didn’t do the countless things she did because they were her greatest dream and desire; she did them because she loved us! As a youngster, I just assumed she loved making dozens of sandwiches everyday for lunch, changing diapers, cleaning up after us, shopping for groceries, serving as referee for our never-ending arguments, and getting interrupted and heckled from dawn to dusk, about anything and everything. A mother’s love is constantly giving to others without counting the cost, without asking, “what will you do for me?” Certainly this is the most beautiful gift a mother gives to her children because it is the gift of herself; a gift which cannot be bought or sold, lost or earned. There is nothing quite like a mother’s love, which is simultaneously fierce and tender and it is no wonder the Scriptures use it as an image of how God loves us. And the only way we can repay such love, is by loving in return.
Knowing what a blessing our moms have been to us, it is alarming to see the social trends that attack and cheapen the essential identity and holy beauty of motherhood and womanhood. Women, with their God-given gifts, play an irreplaceable role in the family, in the Church, and in the world. It is sometimes said that in a family, the father is the head and the mother is the heart. Others describe it with the husband being the head and the wife is the neck which determines where and what the head faces. In any case, both are distinct yet complimentary. When we read the story of creation in Genesis, we are reminded that God made man and woman in his own image, each reflecting different aspects of God’s life-giving love. God also desired man and woman to be partners, not competitors. It was only after sin entered the world that men and women begin to see each other as a threat and adversary. And notice how satan always starts trouble; by attacking the woman! If he can turn her, he can influence the hearts of men! He tries the same approach today which is why it is so important for all of us to pray for and support the many moms and women who who seek to live the gifts God has given them.
Mothers, I hope you know the great treasure you are and forever will be. You are irreplaceable. If you were missing, not even the best dad couldn't fill your shoes. A man, no matter what the culture may say, can never replace you. You possess in your very being, soul, and body, talents given by the Lord which St. John Paul II rightly called “the feminine genius”. It was to uphold this treasure, this unique image of God which each of you reveal, that men were given their masculinity and strength.
Every mother, then, whether married or single, whether in the Church or out, will always be able to find a home in our Church -- for home is where the heart is -- and I pray our parish will always love and defend and celebrate you. We thank God for you. And we're sorry when we haven't loved you nearly as well as you deserve.
May God bless our moms, living and deceased, on this day and every day. May they always know how thankful we are for the countless sacrifices, teachings, and acts of love they did on our behalf. Let us never grow complacent in repaying their dedication and love by praying for them, giving them our respect, and helping them in whatever way they need. For each of them have reflected the image of God to us and we are forever grateful!
