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There are things every Catholic seems to share in common; one that comes to mind is the notorious “Catholic Guilt”. Others might be the fear of strict nuns in grade school or a crusty priest yelling in the confessional. Many more share the memory of playing CYC sports against rival parishes, attending lenten fish fries, or judging someone by which parish or high school they went to. But doesn’t every Catholic know the line given by a parent, teacher, or other elder in response to our complaining with the advice to “Offer it up”!!
As much as we hated hearing that phrase, which was most often translated into parent-speak as “stop complaining”, it seems to have come directly from both the Old and the New Testaments. In fact, one of the sins the Bible singles out for condemnation is grumbling against God and against each other. This might surprise us, especially today, when complaining is such a part of life, where everything is reviewed and judged. In fact, many people consider criticism to be a virtue, "how will things get better if I do not point out what is wrong?" There may be some truth in that, but we have to face the fact that the Scriptures are quite harsh against grumblers.
It was grumbling that brought God's wrath on the people of the Old Testament when they were in the desert. Humans have a terrible tendency to glorify the past, forgetting the bad and exaggerating the good. The Israelites did this when they longed for their old life in Egypt. They forgot that they were slaves there, literally worked to death, and only remembered the rich foods they tasted from time to time. They complained to Moses, "Why have you brought us up out of Egypt to die in this wilderness?...we hate this worthless food." This attitude is familiar to us as well; at some point we have done the same thing, looking past our blessings and focusing on what is not perfect or according to our preference.
It is common enough to complain, but it doesn’t take long before it becomes destructive. That is why James warns us today, "Do not grumble against one another, my brothers, lest you be condemned." In other words, the standard used for our personal judgment will be the same measure we used for those around us. How easy it is to complain about others and condemn their faults and failures while making excuses for ourselves and wanting to receive the benefit of the doubt!.
We waste a lot of time and energy complaining. Usually our criticizing does no good. In most cases, our joy is not taken but given away. And our complaints almost always involve a negative judgment on someone else or even a whole group of people. How rarely do we bother to speak with the person who is irritating us?! Instead we tell everyone except the person who could help solve the problem. No wonder St. James is so adamant that we refrain from doing it!
There is something all of us can do to reduce complaining. and bitterness. One of the main causes is envy. I see someone who has something I want and I become jealous. But instead of focusing on the person who has more, I could think about the person who has less. The truth is, the poorest person in the United States is richer than about 90% of the world’s population. And I would venture to say that most of us are nowhere near the poorest person in our country. No matter what difficulties and problems you and I may have, there is someone worse off, who might need our help, and who would love to have our problems.
Very few people have had it as bad as the man in today's Gospel. King Herod had arrested John the Baptist and thrown him into jail. In those days, prisons were nothing like today. They had no tv’s or reading libraries. Prisoners did not get an hour to exercise in fresh air. They didn't have human rights advocates to defend them. On the contrary, the guards did all they could to treat prisoners cruelly and to make their lives as miserable as possible.
But John didn’t focus his attention on those abuses. When his followers bribed the guards to get a message to him, all John wanted to know was this: "Is Jesus the one to come?" John must have experienced a tremendous joy when he heard the answer:
"The blind regain their sight,
the lame walk,
lepers are cleansed,
the deaf hear,
the dead are raised.”
And most important of all: "the poor have the good news proclaimed to them."
Imagine how beautiful our lives would be if we could learn from John's example. No matter what our present suffering, no matter what trial we are going through, no matter what disappointment has come upon us, or who afflicts us, we found cause for joy. There is nothing to stop us from replacing complaining with rejoicing, from offering it up in a truly holy and happy way; St. John shows us how. He focused on Jesus. He saw everything in relation to him.
This is especially important in our families. Parents have to do their best to protect their children from negativity. You know this better than I, how negativity saturates so much of our world, how it is woven into social media and how young people measure themselves. It can sneak into our conversations and humor, how we talk with and about one another. We also have to protect our children from negativity regarding the Mass. We can start complaining about the music or the homily or even fellow parishioners. In the process we miss the incredible gift Jesus wants to give us: His Word, His own Body and Blood. It is like sitting down to a meal where everything has been prepared and provided for us, and yet we choose to focus on what isn’t perfect or to our liking. We get distracted by the minor stuff and miss what really matters.
Like John the Baptist we need to focus on Jesus. The hardships of prison, everything else that was wrong, he brushed it away to remain focused on what was most true; Jesus was the savior of the world and would not be defeated by sin, death, or darkness. John shows us how we can replace negativity with joy; how we can offer it up, knowing that something far better is just around the corner. Today we lit the third candle of our Advent. It has a rose color that signifies rejoicing. Our deliverance is very near. May we be among the poor who rejoice at this good news and reflect it to others.
