There is a period in a child’s life that tests the patience of every parent, no matter how cute your kid might be or how mild-mannered you are as a parent. This stage begins when a youngster discovers the word “why” and begins to question everything. Even routine things become a topic of philosophic questioning. “I need you to brush your teeth right now.” “Why”? “Because if you don’t, you will get cavities.” “Why”? Because food and drinks can hurt your teeth if you don’t clean them twice a day.” “Why”? And this line of questioning usually ends with something like, “because that’s the way it is” or “that’s how things work”. Experienced parents will short-circuit this whole process by answering the first “why” with a definitive “because I said so”.
But not all questioning is bad. When a child truly wants to understand the “why” of a situation, it often becomes a moment of true learning and growth that parents and teachers are happy to provide. As a priest, there have been some incredible conversations and conversions that have started with someone respectfully asking why we Catholics believe or practice something. The same can be said about God. As an infinitely patient and loving father, he loves it when his children do what he asks and he is not threatened when we humbly ask “why” to grow in understanding his will. One important caveat; We first need to be willing to do what God wants regardless of whether or not we understand why. That is the prerequisite. The gift of understanding is a sort of bonus that builds on our faith and acceptance.
There is a contrast of the right way and the wrong way to ask why written into Luke’s gospel. The Angel Gabriel makes two Annunciations in Luke’s Gospel, one right after the other. Each one is about a child to be born, and, strangely, each birth is completely impossible. At Mass this past Tuesday, the gospel told us that Zechariah’s wife Elizabeth was barren and could not have a child. Today we hear that Mary has no husband and has never had marital relations. In both cases, Gabriel announced two seeming absurdities. Mary’s and Zechariah’s responses to the angel seem the same.
Zechariah: “How shall I know this? For I am an old man, and my wife is advanced in years.”
Mary: “How can this be? I have no relations with a man.”
Ponder these responses for a moment. Can you spot the difference?
Both are responding to God’s steadfast love as announced by Gabriel. We could paraphrase Mary’s response as: “How in the world is this going to happen? I believe but please tell me more so I can understand.”
Zechariah answers with something much different and insulting, even though it sounds almost the same. He says, “How shall I know this?” Not Mary’s “I believe you, but how will it happen,” but “give me some reason to know the truth of your claim. Prove it.”
This kind of question would be understandable if he was dealing with a human person, but its offensive because he is doubting the Almighty. God’s voice had already spoken love deeply into Zechariah’s heart throughout his whole life. By this time, trust in God’s promise should have been woven into the fabric of Zechariah’s life.
His speech was taken away when he challenged the Angel. Which probably made his wife Elizabeth very happy for the duration of her pregnancy! While she was carrying the life of John the baptist inside of her, Zachariah was forced to carry the truth of God’s power and providence in silence for nine months.
Mary on the other hand, simply asked for clarification. She already believed that “nothing is impossible for God,” so she listened with faith. As a result she was given the ability to “speak” the Word of God promised from the beginning of time. Her speaking the beautiful words, “Behold, I am the handmaid of the Lord.
May it be done to me according to your word” is a confirmation of what she already believed.
Do you and I listen to the voice of God’s promise, written in our hearts? Do we trust God as the default before we ask “why” or do we demand he prove himself to us first? Let us ask humbly on this last day of Advent for the grace to trust God and His Plan always. Don’t be afraid to ask Him “why” but make sure that question is preceded by firm faith. The Fulfiller of promises will not fail!
