Variety is the Spice of Life and a Sign of the Spirit (Pentecost 2023)

 To listen to this homily, click here.

One of my favorite parts of having lots of siblings is seeing how each of them has their own unique personality and talents. Even though we might be part of the same family, with the same parents and upbringing, all of us are very different. From an early age, you could see hints as to the type of person my siblings would grow up to be. Some are caregivers and peacemakers, others are gregarious and outgoing, a few are reflective and quiet, and several are fighters, ready to stick up for anyone they feel has been wronged. I see the same diverse patterns as an uncle and I love it! Some of my nieces and nephews are orderly and disciplined. Others are the life of the party and have to be kept in line. Some are open hearts, where tears and laughs come easily while others are stoic and leave you guessing at what they might be thinking. Many of them are laid back and happy to go with the flow while a few are the leaders of the pack, deciding which game will be played and who-sits-where at the kids’ table.  

This is not a unique human experience. Certainly all of you know what I am talking about as you think of similar instances with your friends and family. Even though different personalities might sometimes drive us crazy at home, in social circles or at work, it is that very diversity that makes life exciting, enriching, and enjoyable. It is one of the things I love most about my family. Imagine a home, a world, a church where everyone was exactly the same?! It would be terrible on so many levels! The most dynamic marriages, friendships, families, and parishes tend to be composed of very different personalities united by a shared goal or mission. That is the bond which unifies two or more people who might seem to be at opposite ends of the spectrum.

As a spiritual family here at Incarnate Word, we have that same wonderful mix of personalities, gifts, and talents. Some of you are naturally more outgoing, funny, emotive, or leadership-minded. Others tend to be serious, rational, level-headed, or easy going. Some of you are great planners, have the gift of hospitality, or can see the big picture. Others are detail-oriented, prefer to do things behind the scenes, or are not afraid to speak your mind. However, without something incredible in common, without something significant to unite us, we would be a disaster. Our different personalities and backgrounds would end up being a source of conflict rather than something we celebrate and enjoy. Of course, what brings and keeps us together is not just the fact that we live in St. Louis or grew up in the area or happen to love our parish. What really unites us and makes this parish dynamic is Jesus Christ and his gift of the Holy Spirit, who blesses our individual gifts and personalities and transforms them into something powerful. 

As we say goodbye to another Easter Season and prepare to enter ordinary time for the next 6 months, it is good for us to reflect on the birthday of the Church, the feast of Pentecost. For more than a billion people around the world, the Catholic Church is the bond that unites people of every race and nation. Today is the day when we celebrate the gift of the Holy Spirit, which was poured out on the Apostles, empowering them to go out and gather people together in Christ. After they received the Holy Spirit, the apostles came to life. They begin to fire on all cylinders, their personalities and gifts were on display for the whole world to see. From this point on, they each go their separate ways with their unique talents but united by that one crucial message: “Jesus is risen; death and sin are defeated. Everyone deserves to hear this Good News so they can be saved.”

Each of the apostles would live out their faith in a slightly different way. Some would teach, others would heal and work miracles, while a few would write letters and gospels that we still reflect on today. All of them proclaimed the Good News in their own style, guided by the Holy Spirit but also true to their own personality and life experience. They didn’t become different people after Pentecost, they became transformed people. Their families and friends would have recognized them but would have noticed something new, deeper, more alive. 

The same is true here at Incarnate Word. God wants to bless the individual characteristics that make you who you are. He wants to transform them into the strengths that will enable you to proclaim the gospel in ways that no one else can or has before! He will do this through the gift of His Holy Spirit, first given in baptism and then more fully when we are confirmed. For our part we have three simple things to do. 

1)The first task is to invite the Holy Spirit to make his home in our heart. Even though he is God, the Holy Spirit is gentle and respectful when when it comes to us. He wants to be our welcomed guest and his gifts only work when they are received into a life that is docile and inviting. He won’t force his way into our hearts. So, please, say that simple, ancient prayer often, “come Holy Spirit.” That is all He needs, nothing fancy, just a heartfelt invitation to make his home in your soul. If you ask, he will answer, guaranteed!

2) The second responsibility we have is to develop the personality and gifts we were born with. Becoming a saint does not mean getting rid of these things; it just means we let God use them. If you have a sense of humor, if you are organized, if you love to lead, or study or take care of people or listen, or whatever your talent and disposition is, use it, refine it, and know that, more than likely it will be the way you live out your faith. There is no one way to be holy or serve God and others. In fact each of us will do it in a slightly different manner. That is why it is so important to discover and develop who we are humanly and spiritually.

3) Don’t seek to be comfortable. One of the defining qualities of the Holy Spirit is that he always leads us to do more and be more than we could ever imagine. The Spirit will comfort us at all times and in all things but he cannot work in a heart that wants to control and avoid challenge. The times in my life where I have seen the most growth and the greatest miracles were always when I gave the Holy Spirit permission to stretch me and be in charge. This process of All Things New is an opportunity for our parish and our archdiocese to do just that and we should not let it pass us by!!

If the twelve apostles were able to go out, with the help of the Holy Spirit, and change the world as we know it, imagine what the community of Incarnate Word could do?! As long as we remain friends of God, homes of the Holy Spirit, there is no limit to how He can use us to renew the face of the earth!

Last Words (Ascension, 2023)

 One of the most privileged parts of the priesthood is giving the last rites and being present as someone takes their final breaths. 

In these sacred moments, all of the unimportant things are set aside. No one reminds their family to cut the grass every week or promise to change the air filters for the furnace once they are gone. Those things might be necessary but they are irrelevant. Most often it is not the person dying saying anything at all but rather the friends and family. And what is spoken is always significant and usually simple. Things like, “I love you”, “thank you”, “you can be at peace”, “go join your beloved”, etc… No matter how many times I witness these sacred moments, it always hits me like a ton of bricks and stays with me for days. It also makes me wonder what my last words to loved ones will be… I just hope they can be repeated at my funeral!

With today’s celebration of the Ascension, we get the last words of Jesus from two different sources, St. Luke and St. Matthew. And they are a different type of “last words”. They are not those of a dying person but more like those of a parent who knows their child is about to experience a new stage of life and independence. These are like the words to a 16 year-old who is about to take the car out by themselves for the first time, or the college freshman who is being dropped off at school, or the young person getting ready to head out on vacation with friends. 

These last words are not “goodbye, forever” but rather “I know we need to be separated in this way for your own good but here are some things to keep you safe and on track.”

What does Jesus tell his followers and us?

That they are never alone, He is with them always until the end of time.

That all power in heaven and earth has been given to Him and they are to participate in that saving power by going out into the whole world and baptizing in his name. Their faith is not a private matter to be kept quiet but something that must be shared.

St. Luke builds on this as we hear in Acts that Jesus pours on the loving advice:

Don’t leave Jerusalem until you receive the gift of the Holy Spirit! It’s only a few days away; you can do this!

And when they ask when Jesus is going to return and set everything right, once and for all, he says, trust me, that’s not your concern, just worry about being my witnesses to the world AFTER the Holy Spirit comes to you!

Lastly, he tells them to be witnesses, not just to their friends and families in Jerusalem, but also their countrymen in Judah and even their ethnic enemies in Samaria. They must be good examples always, everywhere, to everyone. No one is excluded from hearing the gospel and everyone deserves a chance to let it transform their lives.

Now what do kids do when their parents give them advice? Usually roll their eyes, or think yeah, yeah, I know just let me get on with it!

Matthew tells us that the disciples doubted when they saw Jesus. They had a hard time accepting his words, but even in the midst of their doubt, they did the right thing, they worshipped him, they submitted to God and in time, with the grace of the HS at Pentecost, they figured it out and became effective witnesses throughout the world.

But Christ’s command to the apostles didn’t stop with them; his mandate to “Go and make disciples of all nations” extends to you and me too. Even though Christ has ascended into heaven, even though we are waiting for his return at any moment of every day, we are expected to evangelize and give witness to all we have received through the gift of our faith. All of us have received the gift of the Holy Spirit by virtue of our Baptism and those of us who have been confirmed have also received the grace of Pentecost in our souls. 

The Ascension reminds us that it is time to spread the gospel by sharing how our faith has made a difference in our lives, whether we are a priest, parent, teacher, professional, full-time student, teen, or child. This is our job as we anticipate Christ’s second coming; we are not just supposed to sit around, hoping we are ready when Jesus returns. 

I point out this command to spread the Good News because far too often people think it is something reserved for deacons, priests, bishops, and these who have consecrated their lives to Christ. And while it is my full-time job to spread the gospel, it is yours as well. One of the reasons many people do not know Christ or live the gospel is because ordinary Christians do not realize the power of their witness and their ability to spread the saving message of Our Lord through daily conversations. One of the reasons our Church is shrinking and why we are going through this painful process of All Things New, is not just a lack of priests, it is also a lack of witness on the part of all Catholics. We have grown comfortable and indistinguishable from those who do not believe. Each of us, by nature of our baptism, is called to be share the Good News and bring Jesus to the people around us. This is the beauty of the Christian vocation; all of us, through our everyday work and relationships, have the opportunity to be made holy and to bring others to Christ. The Ascension compels and commands us to use this time before he returns as an opportunity to bring others to the Lord. It is not enough simply to take care of ourselves.

As we celebrate the Ascension , let us pay close attention to these last words of Christ. First, let us thank God for the gift of our faith, which was given to us by those following the Lord’s command to share the Good News. Second, let us resolve to share our own faith with those we encounter in our lives by the joyful and peaceful ways we carry ourselves and by meaningful and sincere friendship. Finally, let us recommit ourselves to the practice of personal prayer, so our witness to the gospel will not be empty words but a genuine and passionate display of the life of the Holy Spirit. In this way, we will honor Christ by making disciples of all nations.

A Mother's Love (May 2023)

 To listen to this homily, click here.

This past week, our school hosted a morning of celebration with students and their mothers, called “muffins with moms.” It was a fun few hours that started with Mass and continued with a reception in the gym that resulted in nearly 700 blueberry muffins being consumed! I was the celebrant of the Mass and it was sweet to look out at various points during the liturgy and see the students nestled in the pews next to mom, content and happy. What stood out to me was how so many mothers were subtly but constantly drawing their children close, putting their arms around them, connecting and reassuring with affectionate touch. Of course there were a few much-needed mom-glares directed at students goofing around, thinking the time away from teacher was a chance to get away with something. We all know that mom sees everything!

That morning and, of course Mother’s Day which we celebrate today, made me think of the various ways my life and my soul has been nurtured and guided by my mom. There are countless things mom has done for me and I imagine most of them will never be known until I meet God and He shows me the whole picture. However, three main qualities jump out at me regarding a mother’s love as I have experienced it personally but also as I see it present in our families and in our spiritual mother, the Church.

Dependable/consistent: Story of ripping open knee, freaked mom out but she stayed on point. Seemed like mom was never sick or unavailable; in the back of your mind we knew that if all else failed, we could always count on her. I think of all the busy days and long nights taking care of us, putting up with our antics and still making sure a meal was ready, clean clothes were available, and we had everything we needed and more. It seemed like magic at the time, like some special creature got things done and ready for us but of course, it was mom. 

Teacher: Mom was literally our teacher because we were homeschooled. And most of us were not dream students, resembling mules more than humans seeking knowledge! But she hung in there and did what she could to make us as educated as possible, one day after another. 

But this teaching is not the one I am most grateful for, as great as it was. Most importantly, as a priest and as a human, my mom taught me the lessons of the heart. How to care for others, how to sympathize and have empathy, how to show compassion, mercy, and patience. I continue to marvel at my mom’s intuition and instincts and I am grateful that some of those qualities have been infused in me as her son. These lessons of the heart benefit not only me but all those I am called to serve and love in my life. It is wisdom I use every day!

Sacrificial love: There is no way to become a mom without sacrifice. The process of carrying a child in pregnancy and the way a woman’s body gives of itself to foster the gift of life is a living parable of sacrificial love. The birth of a child is just the beginning of how deeply a mother’s heart can love. 

I remember the shock I experienced when I finally started to realize that mom didn’t do the countless things she did because they were her greatest dream and desire; she did them because she loved us! As a youngster, I just assumed she loved making dozens of sandwiches everyday for lunch, changing diapers, cleaning up after us, shopping for groceries, serving as referee for our never-ending arguments, and getting interrupted and heckled from dawn to dusk, about anything and everything. A mother’s love is constantly giving to others without counting the cost, without asking, “what will you do for me?” Certainly this is the most beautiful gift a mother gives to her children because it is the gift of herself; a gift which cannot be bought or sold, lost or earned.  There is nothing quite like a mother’s love, which is simultaneously fierce and tender and it is no wonder the Scriptures use it as an image of how God loves us. And the only way we can repay such love, is by loving in return. 

Knowing what a blessing our moms have been to us, it is alarming to see the social trends that attack and cheapen the essential identity and holy beauty of motherhood and womanhood. Women, with their God-given gifts, play an irreplaceable role in the family, in the Church, and in the world. It is sometimes said that in a family, the father is the head and the mother is the heart. Others describe it with the husband being the head and the wife is the neck which determines where and what the head faces. In any case, both are distinct yet complimentary. When we read the story of creation in Genesis, we are reminded that God made man and woman in his own image, each reflecting different aspects of God’s life-giving love. God also desired man and woman to be partners, not competitors.  It was only after sin entered the world that men and women begin to see each other as a threat and adversary. And notice how satan always starts trouble; by attacking the woman! If he can turn her, he can influence the hearts of men! He tries the same approach today which is why it is so important for all of us to pray for and support the many moms and women who who seek to live the gifts God has given them. 

Mothers, I hope you know the great treasure you are and forever will be. You are irreplaceable. If you were missing, not even the best dad couldn't fill your shoes. A man, no matter what the culture may say, can never replace you. You possess in your very being, soul, and body, talents given by the Lord which St. John Paul II rightly called “the feminine genius”. It was to uphold this treasure, this unique image of God which each of you reveal, that men were given their masculinity and strength. 

Every mother, then, whether married or single, whether in the Church or out, will always be able to find a home in our Church -- for home is where the heart is -- and I pray our parish will always love and defend and celebrate you. We thank God for you. And we're sorry when we haven't loved you nearly as well as you deserve. 

May God bless our moms, living and deceased, on this day and every day. May they always know how thankful we are for the countless sacrifices, teachings, and acts of love they did on our behalf. Let us never grow complacent in repaying their dedication and love by praying for them, giving them our respect, and helping them in whatever way they need. For each of them have reflected the image of God to us and we are forever grateful!

Everyone Has a Plan Until They Get Punched in the Mouth (5th Sunday of Easter, Year A)

To listen to this homily, click here.

This season of spring and the month of May makes it easier for me to smile and be in a better mood! I suppose this is less true for those who suffer from allergies or must cut a lot of grass. But for most, the growing daylight, the warmer temperatures, and the approach of summer with its promise of leisure and relaxation lift the minds and hearts of all. Not to be outdone, the Church chooses this time to celebrate the Lord’s Resurrection and partnered with that comes confirmations, first communions, baptisms, and weddings. Last but not least, this is the season for graduations from grade school, high school, and college. 

Speaking of that, here is a crazy stat you may not know. Only about 46% of college graduates, less than half, work in a field closely related to their major. Think of all the work, all the studying, all the tuition, time, and sacrifice which is then seemingly put aside!  What is the reason for so many students who focus on one thing intensely, then end up going another direction, sometimes drastically so? There has been lots of ink spilled on the topic, about the possibility of refining the way students choose their major and giving them more support in making their decision. Others argue that too many people go to college when they should be entering the trades, and still more maintain that employers must stop demanding degrees for jobs that don’t really require them. 

    There is some truth in all these explanations but I think the main cause is even more simple but perhaps less satisfying: this is life! Life happens and so often, along with the changes it brings, our best plans and ideas go out the window. Don’t get me wrong, it is good to have a plan but we need to know that sooner or later, something is going to happen which will require our plan and us, to change, to adapt, to grow, so we can meet the challenge and work through it. Mike Tyson famously said that everyone has a plan until they get punched in the mouth. Great leaders aren’t the ones who come up with a plan or strategy that never changes, they are the ones who can decisively adapt once the original plan starts to fall apart and fail.

    As I celebrate 15 years of being a priest, very little of what I have actually done and experienced is what I had planned. Of course, saying Mass, hearing confessions, celebrating the other sacraments and ministering to people, that has all played out as I hoped it would. But the places I have been assigned, the people I have served, and at times the ways I have been asked to minister, wow, I never would have drawn it up this way! And I thank God for the many twists and turns, the ups and the downs, the surprises and disappointments. Because in all of them, He has taught me more than any plan or life I could create for myself. Being a friend of God requires me and all of us to be flexible and ok with change. Growing in faith is not accounting for every possible outcome or controlling every part of our lives. Instead, living faith is often nothing more than doing our best to be prepared and ready in a prayerful way for whatever God calls us to do on any and every given day!

We see this in our Scriptures today. In the Acts of the Apostles, the young church is growing by leaps and bounds and has increasing needs that must be met. Some of the widows are not receiving their portion of bread and are going hungry. People raise this concern to the apostles and they take it to prayer to find a solution. The answer they are given is to select seven holy men who will be in charge of the distribution of bread and other works of mercy so that no one is neglected. These seven men are the first deacons of our Church and they become the hands and hearts of the twelve apostles, enabling them to help more people while still allowing the twelve to remain in their ministry of prayer and teaching. Growth and change go hand in hand! The Apostles wisely discern that the way they were doing things was no longer sufficient, a change of plans is needed to stay on mission and faithful to what God wanted. To simply say, “this is how we’ve always done things!” or “I’ve made a decision and that’s the end of the discussion!” was not the right way to proceed.

Even after this creation of the diaconate, things would change further for some of the deacons involved. Stephen was essentially put in charge of the first food pantry but he would end up dying as a martyr. Many of them were trained for the work they were asked to do. But their docility and holy flexibility allowed God to use them where they were needed most and the Church grew even more!

That’s the key to the incredible growth of the young Church; they don’t try to control God or make his plans, they defer to God and let him lead even when it seems crazy. God knows better than us but he still wants us to be part of his process. So often we hijack God’s plans and end up making things messy. Like St. Peter says in the 2nd reading, “The stone that the builders rejected has become the cornerstone”. How often has God used the people, the stones, that we and world have cast aside as the building blocks of his Church, his salvation, and his blessings to the world.

In the gospel, Jesus has just washed the feet of the Apostles and he has turned their world upside down by telling them that in order to reign, they must serve. He has made it clear that he must save the world by dying for it and that where he is going, they know the way. This is all a bit too much for poor Phillip and he asks how they will know the way since they don’t know where Jesus is going. Jesus responds with that beautiful line, meant not only for Phillip but also for us, “I am the way, the truth and the life.” In other words, I am the plan, I am the way out, the path forward, the light in the darkness, the calm in the midst of your storm. 

For you and me, who have many great plans which so often fall apart when life punches us in the mouth, Jesus simply says, look at me. I will get you through, I will show you the next step, I have the answers. 

    

    With this in mind, let’s try to turn our eyes to Jesus more often. Especially before a big decision, in moments of confusion, and when we don’t know what comes next. Let’s make our prayer like that of the early church and let God lead rather than trying to bend God to what we want, which never turns out well. Let’s make sure that we are involving God in all our plans and always giving him the final say. Finally, let’s never forget that God always knows best and he will always choose the greatest good for us because he is the way, the truth, and the life!