With Power Comes the Command to Serve (29th Sunday, Year B)

 To listen to this homily, click here.

One of the best parts of my week is when I get to go over and talk to our students, either in the day school or PSR. No matter how rough my day has been or how much I have on my mind, their curiosity and innocence reminds me why I love being a priest. Recently, I spoke with some of our younger students. They had a number of questions for me to answer, one of which was, “how does a person become a deacon, a priest, a bishop, and even the pope”? After explaining the process of formation, education, and evaluation, one of the students exclaimed that he would like to be pope. I had to laugh, because I remember thinking very same thing when I was little. On one hand, it seems like the best job in the world. You get to fly around the world, people go nuts whenever you visit, you get the lots of Italian food, and you even get to ride in the Pope-Mobile. Over the last 100 years, our church has been blessed with incredible men, many of them Saints, who have served as our Popes. Their example has reminded us that with great power comes an even greater responsibility to serve others with humility and generosity.

This is the lesson Jesus must teach his followers in today's Gospel. Jesus has become incredibly popular at this point of his ministry, working miracles, attracting huge crowds, and some are even trying to make him king. James and John can sense the authority and power Jesus has and they want some of it for themselves. James and John ask Jesus for places of honor, one at his right and one at his left. But they want it for the wrong reasons. They want this power so they can be in charge and enjoy the worldly benefits of prestige and rank. Jesus patiently reminds them that his followers must use any power and authority they receive as leverage to serve others. This is, naturally, the opposite of what the world believes.

Leadership, of course, is essential. Power is necessary. Power makes decisions and gets things done. But, to quote Lord Acton, “all power eventually corrupts and absolute power corrupts absolutely”, unless it is grounded in the teachings of Jesus Christ. And leaders, remember, include us, not just the high and mighty CEOs, but us: parents, principles, managers, teachers, board members, policemen, scoutmasters, pastors, doctors —- anyone who has charge of or leads the lives of others. In the Christian life all such leaders, including you and me, are servants who are there “not to be served but to serve and to give their lives as a ransom for many.” That radical teaching - and it is outrageously radical if you think about it - is a deep spirituality to live by, a necessary and humble interior balance a Christian must embrace. The more power I have, the more respect I must show, the more service I must render, the more aware of others I must be.

You and I are called to be servant-leaders of whatever power or authority has been given to us. What are some practical ways we can know if we are imitating Christ’s example? First, servant leaders pay attention to the rank-and-file people around them. No person, no matter what their education, influence, or occupation, is dismissed or looked down on. How about us? How do we treat the people who work the cash register, prepare our meal, repair our homes and vehicles, or pick up the trash? Are we kind, polite, and aware of them as people? Do we remember their name, learn about their lives and families, or sincerely ask how they are doing? When they answer, do we listen? Secondly, servant leaders learn to think communally, not selfishly. What goes into our decision-making? Is it only about profit, sales, career, getting ahead, or looking better than others? Are there considerations as to the long-range impact on the family, the community, or the environment? Finally, servant leaders strive for that humility which enables them to ask if they're part of the problem. They are not afraid to be accountable to others and accept constructive criticism, knowing that they are far from perfect. Are we someone who can be challenged and corrected or are we unapproachable? I think this is the most difficult of the three to adopt and embrace. Very rarely does correction come from someone who is blameless or flawless in the way they offer criticism. And sometimes 90% of what they are saying doesn’t apply. But with an open heart, we can grow from the 10% that does. We should never forget that without challenging feedback, any one of us can become a tyrant. 

Let’s return to James and John who want the privilege, power, and position without the cross; they want his leadership without serving others. It must've been totally embarrassing when, at the end of the day, there were two lowly thieves, one at Jesus’ right and one at His left as he prepared to enter his heavenly kingdom. Not quite what they first imagined, but it made Jesus’ point.

We might wonder: did James and John and the others eventually get the message? Did they get to drink from the same chalice Jesus drank? I think so. About 12 years after Jesus's death, James was the first apostle to suffer martyrdom. Tradition adds that Andrew was tied to a cross, Bartholomew was skinned alive, Peter was crucified upside down in Rome, the other James was thrown from the Temple roof, Thomas was run through with a lance in the East Indies, Jude was pierced with arrows, Philip was hanged; only John escaped a gruesome death. Interestingly enough, he was the only apostle present during the crucifixion.  

We probably won’t have to go so far as martyrdom, but we do have to recognize that the gospel message clearly state that worldly power and position are on the other side of servant leadership: followers of Jesus do not sit and wait to be served. They stand in solidarity with the world's most famous foot-washer and they serve everyone regardless of social status. And they do so with clear intentions of God’s love and joy because that is where true greatness is found!

God Still Believes in Marriage (27th Sunday, Year B)

 To listen to this homily, click here.

Today we have a challenging Gospel as Jesus declares unequivocally the life-long permanence of marriage and reminds us that it is not a human invention but actually part of God’s plan from the very beginning. He does it with language that leaves no wiggle room for nuance or exceptions. "Whoever divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery against her." These words upset Jesus' hearers then and they upset people today.

Before reflecting on Jesus' teaching on marriage, I would like take a step back and consider their context. This forceful teaching flows from what Jesus has been telling us in recent weeks: First, Jesus announced his own suffering, death and resurrection, then told us that each follower must take up his own cross and follow him. Peter tried to dissuade Jesus and Jesus said, "Get behind me, Satan." The other apostles also misunderstood Jesus. They started arguing about who is greatest. Jesus responded by placing a child in front of them and told them they must become like little children.

No child can claim independence. They always rely on someone else, usually their parents or someone who represents them. For that reason we have a commandment that says, "Honor your father and mother." For a young person the first person they should seek to love, honor, and obey should be their parents. Marriage, however, changes that. Jesus quotes the book of Genesis: "God made them male and female. For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.”

When someone marries, their spouse now takes first place. Not everyone seems to get this! There’s the story of the newly-married guy whose wife prepared a special meal for him. "It's OK," he said, "but my mom makes it better!" That guy hasn't left his mother. Of course we must always honor our mom and dad, but when someone marries, they no longer belongs to their parents. They belong to their spouse. This is what it means when the bible says, “The two become "one flesh.”

The two can become one flesh precisely because God made us male and female. As Pope St. John Paul observed, our bodies have a language. The very shape of our bodies as men and women speaks of self-giving and receptivity. Becoming one flesh is so real and powerful that God gave it the awesome ability to create new life.

In marriage the man and woman belong completely to each other. Not like pieces of property but as free and total gifts. Living this truth is difficult. There is a joke about the woman who went to the priest and said, "Father, I want to be a humble wife, but it is hard...because he is always wrong and I am always right.” Don’t we all have this thought sometime, even if we don’t say it out loud?!

Today’s readings remind us what we were made for from the first moment of creation; we were meant to give ourselves freely to another person in humble love and service. For the majority of people in this church, that gift of self will be lived out in marriage. For a few, as a priest or religious, this gift will be given directly to God as a sign of his kingdom, where there will be no more marriage because we will be perfectly united to God. But for all of us, regardless of our individual vocation, the reality remains the same; we must give ourselves to another if we wish to be truly happy and fulfilled. 

    For Adam and Eve, before Original Sin, this was easy and joyful. For us, affected by sin and weakness, it is difficult. We like to hold on to our freedom and preferences while trying to impose our wishes on others. We tend to be suspicious, cynical, and wonder if we are being used or taken advantage of. But that is not what God intended. God wants us to be in community. He wants men and women to be partners, equal in dignity even as they offer different capabilities and gifts. Whether we are married or not, we can begin to restore the world to what God intended by promoting mutual respect, loving service, and generosity between men and women. The irony of our faith is that we become full of grace, joy, and peace by pouring ourselves out in service to others rather than holding back and putting ourselves first. We become strong by humbling ourselves and depending on God and each other like little children. And we find life by taking up our cross and following after Jesus.  

  Just imagine for a minute what a different world it would be if instead of God saying, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a suitable partner for him,” God would have said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make an iPhone for him” or, “I will give him a TV” We might smile at the absurdity of the idea, but maybe that world is closer than we think. Are we becoming more like Adam before the creation of Eve and “alone” because we have the constant preoccupation and noise of things like smartphones, tv, and technology distracting us from communion with each other? How much has technology and entertainment interfered with the relationship people have with their spouse and children? Or, taken to the extreme, has a smartphone, social media, or sports superseded the importance of being truly present to our spouse and loved ones? If you think I’m exaggerating, go to a restaurant and watch people beholden to their phones, even as they ignore the person before them! 

Many people say that traditional marriage is finished. That young people prefer to live together and when they do marry, those marriages seem so fragile. And, along with all that, a growing number redefine marriage so that it has it does not require being male and female, but any two adults who have a strong, mutual attraction.

Should we just raise the white flag, admit defeat and focus our energy somewhere else? That is tempting, but we need to look at Jesus' example. Marriage was in pretty bad shape in his time. As we heard, Moses allowed a man to simply write a note to dismiss his wife because the people had become so hardened. And in the Roman Empire, while Jesus lived, marriage was in decline. So much so that Caesar Augustus tried to strengthen traditional marriage by offering incentives to those that stayed married, but with little effect. People preferred their individual freedoms and saw commitment as a threat to pursuing pleasure. If this sounds similar to our own time, it’s because this is not a new problem!

But Jesus does not give in to discouragement. He knows the human heart and how noble it can be when it cooperates with his grace. He sees beyond our immediate troubles and weakness and goes back to the very beginning, before we were wounded by sin. If God does not give up on us or on marriage, neither should we. We are indeed presented with a difficult and challenging teaching. It requires courage and humility, but is worth any sacrifice. It is what we were made for and it is what will lead us back to the original happiness and harmony God intended for the world.