This Sunday we have the wonderful story of Jesus’ conversation with the woman at the well. Jesus had sent his disciples off for food, and he is sitting at a well when she comes to draw water. This story might lose some of its impact for us 2000 years later but by all Jewish cultural standards she was considered completely worthless and unworthy of even the simple gesture of a greeting. The fact that Jesus had an extended conversation with her and asked for a drink of water was completely scandalous, even to his most loyal followers.
Why? First, she is a woman and she is at the well at the hottest point of the day. Many interpret this as John’s gentle way of saying that she was a woman who made her living at night by selling her body to others. It is only the disciples’ awe of Jesus that keeps them from asking him why he is talking to her without a chaperone to keep watch and protect his reputation.
Secondly, she is a Samaritan. As she herself points out, Jews don’t talk to Samaritans. Samaritans are self-made outcasts from the Jewish point of view, because of their intermarriage to five different tribes after the invasion of the Assyrians some 700 years before Jesus was born. Because of this, any self-respecting Jew would stay away from them because of their racial impurity. Talk about a long-lasting grudge!
I don’t think it's fair for us to hear this story without also remembering that it could not have been easy for the woman to accept Jesus. She likely had become cynical about men and as a Samaritan she would have also been raised with a hostility to Jews. Think of the disgust some Democrats feel about Republicans - and vice versa - and you will have a tiny idea of the bad blood between Samaritans and Jews. What a remarkable heart this woman must have had to move beyond her personal and cultural cynicism and remain open to Christ.
Thirdly, this woman has the sort of history that makes her a pariah even in her community. Jesus knows her status, and he lets her know he does. She admits she has had five husbands. Even by the lax standards of our time, this personal history would make people raise their eyebrows and take note. In her village she is undoubtedly a shamed person. Bishop Barron offers us a way to understand the deeper meaning behind these failed relationships that can also apply to ourselves. He says: "Think of the five husbands as five errant paths the woman has taken. She has 'married' herself to wealth, pleasure, honor, power, material things, etc.""Or think of them as five ideologies or gurus she has followed hoping to find joy.” If that is the case, if Jesus were to sit with you and me, how many failed marriages would he see within our hearts? Maybe not to another person, but to the things of this world or a certain way of life? How many times have we given ourselves wholeheartedly to someone or something, hoping they could offer us something that only God can provide? If that is the case, maybe the number of our “marriages” is even higher than 5!
All of these factors combine to make this woman, in the eyes of the Jewish people and the ancient world, a worthless person. So what turns things around so that she not only accepts the living water Jesus offers her but then becomes the one who evangelizes her whole town and brings them to believe in Christ? What is the miracle that Jesus performs here and could it ever be repeated?
The first miracle Jesus does for the Samaritan woman is that he listens to her. In general, as modern people, we are terrible listeners to each other and to God. For example, how many could tell me, without looking, whose gospel I just read from? How many times do we meet someone new and immediately forget their name.? If you have any doubts about the state of modern man’s listening abilities, look at our nation’s politics and you will see how poorly we practice this skill and the division that results.
If we want to welcome back the outcasts, the ones who are deemed unclean or worthless by our society, we will start by becoming good listeners. What does it mean to be a good listener, not only with loved ones but also with God? Matthew Kelly gives 5 concrete ways to become a better listener. They are: maintain eye contact, be focused on understanding instead of responding, show your attention through body language, interact with the speaker, and listen without fixing. Today we see the skill of Jesus as his listening skills turns a potentially hostile person into a powerful ally and evangelizer! Of course, Jesus is God, but in his humanity he models focused listening - so much so that the Samaritan woman exclaims, "He told me everything I have done.”
The second miracle Jesus works is showing without shaming that only his love can fulfill her deepest desire. By leading her to acknowledge her sinful past he helps her to heal so she can open her heart and hold nothing back. Jesus doesn’t deny her sinful past or her previous bad decisions but he offers her a future free from regret and failed love.
The world needs the example of caring Christians who are caring, compassionate listeners, following the example of Jesus. We can only learn that skill by first practicing it with God in daily prayer. The more we listen to God the better we will be able to listen to each other. Secondly, You and I should come clean about our past. We have to own up to our sin, to be truthful about who we are and tell him how many gods we have chased and things we’ve wed ourselves to. Only God can satisfy us, only his love can bring us peace, joy, and fulfillment. Everything else, everyone else might do the job for a while but ultimately they will let us down. Thank God for the miracle of his willingness to always listen to us and to help us understand the desires of our own hearts. May we receive these gifts from God and then lead others to them like the Samaritan woman.
