Any preacher who dares to get up and speak on Mother’s Day faces at least three problems or dangers. They are: 1) the danger of appearing to be an “expert” on motherhood, 2) the danger of using Mary as the model of motherhood, and 3) the danger of facing a very mixed congregation. The danger of being an expert: you all know the story of the priest who got up and spoke at great length on the glories of motherhood. And when he walked outside a woman came up to him and said, “ Father, I wish I knew as little about being a mother as you do.” Or the other priest who preached about Mary as the perfect model to be a wife and mother. And a woman came up to him, carrying one baby and with four other children following her, and said, “It’s easy enough for her with her one child!” And then, our congregation is mixed. We celebrate Mother’s Day, we talk about and honor mothers. And yet, many of our congregation are not mothers, and some, like myself are not married and are not women. Nevertheless, what we all have in common is we’ve all had a mother. We’ve all had the experience of a mom and how her love can heal and form us and that justifies speaking about motherhood, no matter what the dangers might be. So thank you, to all of our moms who have shone us countless acts of love. We know that one day is not enough to thank you for all that you do!
On this day where we pause to thank God for the gift of motherhood, I think it is important to note that the concept and dignity of women and motherhood are under a very dangerous attack in our society. Can we ignore the alarming spread of pornography in our homes, in marriages, even among our young people? Or the often-overlooked scourge of domestic violence which breaks the spirit of so many women, hurting and crying out for help? Or what about the shameless objectification of the female body in advertising and entertainment where a person is reduced to an object simply to sell a product.
All of these things sadly, are present in our culture and are accepted by many as the way things are. It is ironic that our society calls us today to honor motherhood while at the same time promoting the very practices that attack the dignity of the women we wish to show our appreciation for.
Now there are many other evils in our society that are detrimental to women. But I want to zero in on one in particular because it is causing incredible damage and heartbreak. It is devastating to all people but it is harming women most deeply. Therefore, on this Day dedicated to moms and women, let’s honor them by considering what we can do make things better.
The evil that I want to approach is also the most difficult because it is considered a good thing by so many people. It thought to be off-limits by others, something the Church shouldn’t talk about. It has been hailed as the liberation of women, the thing that levels the playing field against men. It was seen as the solution for so many domestic problems and the beginning of new horizons for every female. It would give her control and power, she could be in charge without being subjected to men. This evil is found in the thing known as artificial contraception.
Since its introduction, especially in the pill more than 50 years ago, it has been touted as the answer to so many problems that plague modern women. It was supposed to improve marriage, increase the quantity and quality of sexual intimacy, free women from the natural rhythm of their bodies. It promises many good things, it looks so perfect, and yet those who use it end up experiencing a deep spiritual sadness and the nagging emptiness of being used.
Why is it that our society has encouraged women to do things to their bodies, some of these thing very permanent, that go against the feminine nature or “feminine genius” as Blessed John Paul II called it? Why is it that so many women have accepted birth control as the thing that will make them happy or give them control or make them equal with men? And yet, how often the very opposite comes true. More and more, women are seen as objects for men’s pleasure; things to be had on a whim without consideration for the woman or her body. The very thing that was supposed to empower women had led countless women to be used and hurt. The hallmarks of femininity, such as the reception of new life, a nurturing spirit, and quiet gentleness are being replaced by anger, bitterness, and domination.
If there is one thing that I want every woman, single or married, young or old, to hear, it is this: you deserve better! You deserve the respect of others! You deserve the respect of men for who you are as a daughter of God and sister in Christ, not for the pleasure you provide or the ways you measure up against worldly expectations. You deserve to hear from the Church and from a priest, that artificial contraception is a moral evil, it is lie that will only bring you sadness, emptiness, and pain.
As a woman you share the privilege of bringing new life into being. Allow this truth to take root in your life and don’t be afraid to respect yourself enough to demand this dignity from others. As men, we need to protect that gift and honor and cherish women as God created them, not necessarily as society sees them. This can be done practically by remembering that each person is made in the image of God and we are all children of God. As a Church we need to support men and women in bringing forth new life and by growing in mutual love and respect. This will strengthen marriages, fortify families, and build up society. This is not simply a nice idea for someone else to try but something that each and every person plays a part in making a reality. As a matter of fact it is one of the most important ways that we live out the love we are called to in our second reading from St. John. So, on this Mother’s day, let us be thankful for the incredible gift of woman and motherhood, and let us, like the psalmist, “give thanks to God for we are fearfully and wonderfully made!”
